Alfred Pennyworth-less

News flash: if you wear a top hat and suit, you're probably not poor. That's so 1927.

Alas--I did not win the prize awarded by the Balls of Power.

My WishList shall have to wait--until at least Saturday night, whereupon I am virtually guaranteed to win a lump-sum payout of $177 million.

In the interim, I shall go back to my daily task of tripping old ladies, leaving them business cards anonymously in their Yo-Cream at Old Country Buffett, and convincing them that Starbucks' disdain for sidewalk maintenance on their premises is the primary causation of their ruptured MCL.

Rumor of the Day: Bill Gates Doesn't Care About Old People. How do I know it? You should see my bosses trying to use Windows XP. Downright evil!

Disprove it!